a blow-by-blow record of this past week

In a few hours (six hours to be exact), I would have been in charge of the kids solo for exactly a week. This sounds like a paltry amount of time, but it's a pretty big milestone for me. I've done this for six days in Seattle when I was two months pregnant and Declan was a little over 1.5 years old. Just one kid and I had the local YMCA which provides free childcare in the mornings, as well as Christy popping by to hang out on weeknights. I've also done this for five days in Kaohsiung when Declan was two and Petra was six months old. However, that time my mom had came by the apartment in the afternoon sometimes to help divert Declan, so I didn't feel completely alone.

There's been a couple of times, like tonight, when I seriously wanted to do bodily harm to Declan for his behavior. I'm starting to suspect that he's really angry about his dad not being around, and he's taking it out on me by contradicting my statements, ignoring my direct instructions to not do something, and criticizing a lot of things I'm doing (such as telling me that the food I gave him "tastes like crap"). It's like I'm already dealing with an American teenager in my household. Good grief.

There's also been a surprising amount of time when I felt at ease, enjoying my kids' company. Even tonight, there were flashes of priceless moments like when Declan flashed a cute face/hand gesture that he must have picked up from kindergarten, and Petra tried to copy him but couldn't master the wink so she has both eyes closed tightly as she grinned like him. Declan and I laughed together at that, and Declan showed me another hand gesture--a jaunty salute. He also pointed out to me as I was picking him up today his calisthenics teacher, "Mr. Alligator." His teacher had already passed by us, but overheard Declan talking about him and turned back to wave to us. Declan described all the fun activities Mr. Alligator leads the students in, as well as all the toys he gives them to play with. I said, "You really like his class, huh, Declan?" And Declan replied, "He doesn't have classes! We just play next to my classroom!"

So, on Saturday, the kids lounged around at home watching morning cartoons (don't judge me) while I cleaned around the apartment. Then we took a church-organized bus to a nearby wildlife refuge and picked up trash along the beachfront. Declan used tongs and everything. Then we had a BBQ by the beach after we dropped off the trash bags. Then Declan peed his pants because he was having too much fun and forgot until it was too late. Petra also had a good time sliding down the sand.

On Sunday, I biked with the kids (back carrying Petra with the Ergo, Declan in the child seat--just like every day to and back from his school) to church. Afternoon nap time was a struggle. I don't really remember what happened the rest of the afternoon/night.

On Monday, school drop off and pick up and then, after dinner, we went for a stroll around campus/Declan on his tricycle. One of the dishes at dinner was chicken soup that a friend from church had made and dropped off at my place on Saturday. Her middle school-aged son also gave Declan a toy train, which Declan partially broken within the first 10 seconds of playing.

On Tuesday, I attended women's bible study at my local church and had lots of food for thought apart from childcare matters so that was a really nice change/addition. Then I dropped off Petra's ROC passport application and related documents to a travel agency. After diner, I unpacked all the boxes that've arrived from Israel while the kids played with the emptied out boxes. One of the dishes at dinner was some salted chicken which the pastor of my local church gave to me after service on Sunday. The kids loved it, but I suspect that's the cause of Petra's current light diarrhea (not health-threatening, but a hassle to live with). The chicken was pretty oily. (And, yes, I've given up on being vegan all the time now that I live in Taiwan. It seems, however, that my Israel-induced aversion to pork and general hesitation towards all meats is a fairly permanent thing.)

On Wednesday, a neighbor volunteered to watch Petra so I could go for a run, so I kind of overdid it and ran a little over 7 kilometers before I restrained myself from abusing my neighbor's kindness. It felt so good to have that freedom to do something I love and don't want to stop loving (which would happen when I don't do it enough, and then transition time is needed to re-love it again). Declan had wanted a particular toy from the McDonald's "Happy Meal" that he saw during Monday's post-dinner outing, so on this night, we had Happy Meal takeouts and watched "101 Dalmations" on Youtube. Declan's verdict is that it was a bad movie because the puppies got stolen. He told me I made a poor choice in showing him that movie. I ended up eating most of the McDonald's and the kids ate almost nothing.

Today (Thursday), I babysat my aforementioned neighbor's one-year-old daughter, who is three months younger than Petra. Petra and the girl played in the morning while my neighbor rode her moped to a nearby city for baking supplies. (The city, Zhubei, is a fairly new settlement that's popular with expats, so naturally it has more Western/Westernized resources.) She gave me three cupcakes in a pretty box when she picked up her daughter. I was pretty much along with the kids for the rest of the day, minus the shallow pleasantries at Declan's school during pickup time. Petra failed to take her afternoon nap, and she's still pooping all over the place.

Tomorrow, I plan to take the kids via a free shuttle after school to a playspace for which I'd bought some reduced entrance fee certificates. It'll be more all right if they go to bed later and wake up later. It being a Friday, just psychologically, I feel lighter and more cheerful about the coming day.

Daniel returns after the kids (hopefully) go to bed on the last Sunday of this month. A little over another week. May I (and the children) survive unscathed.